The Hidden Cost of Healing

At Soul & Law, we study the human cost of conflict inside systems that are meant to protect, care for, or support others. Healthcare is one of the clearest examples: a field defined by altruism yet vulnerable to structural pressure, interpersonal tension, and ethical strain.

This anonymous interview comes from a physician who recently experienced significant workplace conflict. Their words are published with minimal editing to preserve clarity while maintaining the integrity of their lived experience.

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What forms of conflict have you observed most often in the medical field?
The biggest source of conflict I’ve seen is interpersonal tension — between physicians, and between physicians and nurses.

Another major issue is the difficulty of securing the resources my patients need while still managing all my other responsibilities in extremely limited time. The pressure from these competing demands creates strain that escalates quickly.

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What are the psychological consequences for physicians who go through traumatic professional experiences?
For me, the greatest impact was losing the joy I once felt in wanting to do this work. I even thought about changing specialties or leaving medicine entirely.

Another consequence was self-doubt — the worry that something was wrong with me, and that this was why I couldn’t cope. Medicine requires a high degree of confidence, and when that confidence is shaken, simply doing the job becomes incredibly difficult.

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What needs to change in hospital culture to prevent these conflicts from recurring?
Support. Support. And more support.

Physicians often have none. We don’t have unions or representatives, and hospitals rarely back us when conflicts arise. When issues involve nurses, they have strong representation and union support; their supervisors are almost always on their side. Physicians never experience that. We are usually the first ones blamed and the last ones believed.‍

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How can legal and psychological approaches work together to protect healthcare professionals more effectively?
Doctors need better education. Many of us don’t know our rights, don’t understand the legal framework surrounding our actions, and don’t know what psychological or legal resources we can access.

We are often told that seeking legal or psychological help looks like admitting guilt, being defensive, or lacking credibility. That message creates fear and discourages us from reaching out when we need support the most.

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If you could change one thing in the system, where would you start?
I’ve thought a lot about advocating for stronger physician unions. Having union representation or a structured support network could help doctors defend their rights and secure the resources they need — whether during conflict or in discussions about workload, compensation, and patient care.

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Why This Testimony Matters for Soul & Law

At Soul & Law, we view personal accounts like this one not simply as stories, but as qualitative data that illuminate how systems affect the people working within them. These narratives help reveal patterns of harm that are often overlooked in institutional environments: the erosion of dignity, the fear of retaliation, the absence of psychological safety, and the emotional cost of care.

By gathering and studying these experiences, our project aims to contribute to a more humane and interdisciplinary framework of organizational justice — one that integrates psychological insight, legal understanding, and ethical responsibility.

Healthcare professionals who have lived through similar situations are invited to share their perspectives with us, anonymously or openly. Each contribution expands our understanding of systemic harm and helps shape the work needed to build safer, more accountable professional environments.